


When I Grow Up

by NellDaie



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, False Identity, Flashbacks, Healing, Hiding, Lies, MC's name is Emma, Sexual Abuse, Teacher-Student Relationship, Tutoring
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-20
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-10-21 07:58:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10681047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NellDaie/pseuds/NellDaie
Summary: Eilis Hannity worked hard to get rid of her accent and her former life. She's living her dream as a teacher at SKY University when she meets a student that needs some serious help. Rated Mature for content and possible smut later.Might contain spoilers related to most routes as this takes place after the events of the secret after ending 2. MC3 is typically the red- headed MC and probably one of my favorites.





	1. Big Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> MC2 (the blonde) is her roommate and I have named her Caroline. I always call MC1 Emma and pair her up with Seven, though I'm not sure how prevalent that relationship will be (probably not much if at all).

_His hands were tangled in her hair. He kissed her roughly, possessively. She was 13, and barely a woman. It had been 2 years since the nightly visits started, so when the older man laid her down on the clean, lush sheets, she closed her eyes and retreated into herself. Like a mantra, she reminded herself of her dreams._

_"I'll be a teacher. I'll be far away. I'll help someone. I'll help anyone. I'll help myself. I'll disappear. I can be someone else. I can be who I want to be..." on and on and on. Until the pain subsided and she could sleep._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eilis woke up with a start. She blushed at the drool running down her chin and brushed her wild, curly red locks away from her eyes to look at the clock. She had an hour before her class started. A new semester always excited her. It had been 10 years since she had come to Korea, and the hustle and bustle of this place was a welcome change from her native Ireland. She learned the language pretty well- having just thrown herself into it, but still found herself drawn to her love of English Literature. That was what she found herself teaching after earning her degree. She found that the students in this university knew a fair amount of English, but couldn't understand her accent, so the process of removing her traditional Irish lilt was almost harder than getting her actual teaching degree.

She took one final look in the mirror before leaping out of her room with her typical exuberance for the day ahead. Caroline, bleary- eyed and yawning from her overnight cleaning shift, handed Eilis the coffee she had in vain made and shuffled off to bed. The 28 year old teacher downed it (as if she needed MORE energy) and busted through the front door of the apartment- remembering to stop briefly to lock it before sprinting to her beloved work.

"GOOD MORNING, CLASS!!" She belted out as she walked into the room. She could tell from the astonished looks and various glares that this class was not full of morning people. She wasn't deterred, though and wrote her name on the board as she had every semester before. She started to go into her usual spiel about what they would learn and what would be expected of them throughout the term when the door was thrown open and a blur of yellow zoomed past her and settled into a seat. She blinked.

"You're late." She said simply. The boy, who looked like he didn't even come close to college age looked sheepish and placed his bag on the floor.

"Yeah, sorry...I...had a late night...." He turned red and looked at her pleadingly.

"What's your name?" She asked, wanting to set boundaries early on.

"Kim. Yoosung Kim." She almost felt pity for him- he looked like he was about to faint.

"Well, Mr. Kim, don't let it happen again. I haven't called role yet, so you're okay today, but you only get 3 tardies throughout the semester so use them wisely." He nodded profusely, his golden hair bouncing up and down.

Pity...was something that Eilis would feel a lot for the young man throughout the first few weeks of the semester. While everyone else in the class had no problem keeping up with the work, Yoosung had an uncanny ability to be at least 3 readings behind everyone else. He always looked tired or rundown (though he managed to arrive on time, somehow).

She sat with Caroline munching on a leftover roll from lunch after her class had ended for the day. Caroline worked the night shift cleaning at C&R and other big companies in the city, so she was still lounging in pajamas before she absolutely had to get into her work clothes. 

"I don't understand how someone can have no motivation...he wants to be a vet but I don't see how that's possible with his grades like they are..." Eilis lamented.

"Are they ALL bad or just your class?" Caroline picked a stray piece of mystery fuzz off her eyelash.

"Um...they're all kind of bad...." she admitted. She had done a decent amount of research on the kid, hoping to find something that would explain his lack of motivation. The only thing she could find was that he was 21 years old and was actually pretty good in school until the end of his Freshman year at SKY. 

"Why don't you tutor him? Weren't you valedictorian?" Her roommate responded with what seemed like a reasonable enough answer.

"Hm...I guess I could offer. He's still on his core right now..." It was worth a try. He seemed like he had a lot of potential. He was also a lot like a little lost puppy. Something about his demeanor made her want to help him.

 _I'll help someone. I'll help anyone..._ her old mantra echoed in her head, filling her with a new sense of purpose. 

"YES! That's exactly what I'll do!!" She leapt up, startling the blonde woman out of her chair. Eilis ran to her room to start a plan for tutoring the young man. Caroline just stared at the now closed door to the teacher's room, trying to slow down her frantic pulse.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Yoosung, please see me after class." The teacher placed a test face- down on his desk. Face- down was always very very bad. She remembered grading it and having the panicked thought that maybe he had been in an accident of some sort and suffered brain damage. He had managed to get only 1 out of 50 questions correct. And she was almost certain he guessed on that one. She saw him groan when he looked at his grade, and a fired up sense of responsibility flared within her. She couldn't wait for class to be over.

When the time had finally come, he stood in front of her desk with that sheepish look on his face that he wore the first day of class. Everyone else filtered out fairly quick, which left them the only two people in the room. 

"Yoosung, do you have a part time job?" She asked, wanting to make sure the schedule she prepared would fit.

"N- no. My parents send me money for expenses...and pay for tuition..." He looked so embarrassed, she almost wanted to hug him.

"Well, how about I tutor you after class?" She said, noting his surprised amethyst eyes as they widened.

"On English Literature?"

"On everything." She smiled congenially. He still looked confused. "Listen, you want to be a vet, right?" 

"Well, yeah..." He stepped back when she jumped out of her seat, locking him in a serious stare.

"Well, I'm going to help you! If it's your dream, it's my job as a teacher to help you get there!" He was equally surprised when her slender hands landed on his shoulders and gripped them tightly. "I have a plan! Don't worry!" She said brightly. Yoosung smiled, and Eilis was certain she had never seen him do so before. He was now as energetic as she was.

"YEAH!!" He said, bobbing his head in agreement.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That was the spirit in which Yoosung's tutoring began. After a couple weeks, it actually started to show progress. Eilis delighted in how ecstatic he seemed to show her his recent Calculus test. She had grown to really look forward to seeing him after class. When the sun came in through the window and hit him just right, she could make out tiny droplets of sun glinting off of his naturally brown eyelashes. This was the case one particular day when he looked down intently at a particularly tricky problem. 

"So...if I move this here...I should get this answer, right?" He looked up excitedly at her. She blinked.  _Crap...I haven't been listening. I can't let him know that. And now he looks concerned because I haven't said anything..._

"Uh..sorry...I was just thinking. You raised all of your grades! We should celebrate! And I should get to know my students better, so let's take a walk!" That was a lie. She wanted to get to know him better. She knew what the student files could tell her, but nothing else.

"Is that really okay? Will people get the wrong idea?" He asked. The slight tinge of pink on his cheeks told her that they might. He was right, she should be more careful. She sighed. 

"Yeah...you're right...bad idea." She tried to hide the disappointment in her voice. But she couldn't figure out why she was so disappointed. She had tutored students before. Students pretty similar to him. Maybe he just had a little brother feeling to him.  _Yeah! He's like the little brother I never had! He's so precious. And small...skinny actually...does he eat well? Where do his parents live?_ Her eyes slowly widened at the motherly concerns running through her head. 

"Does your mom live nearby? What do you eat for dinner?" She blurted out. Yoosung stared at her incredulously. 

"My...my mom lives in the country. I can cook but I'm on a budget so I guess I eat a lot of bread and rice?" He had that look on his face like he thought he was in trouble. She turned red at her sudden outburst, and ruffled her fingers through her hair impatiently. She really needed to relax around this kid. 

"Right, sorry. I...have a little brother and I couldn't help myself being concerned." She smiled a big smile while she told a big lie. She felt guilty for the relief and understanding that Yoosung showed her. 

"Oh, really? I get it! No problem!" He returned the grin, and they both went back to the problem in front of them. 

When Eilis got home that evening, she couldn't stop the worrying. She felt like a mother hen or something, and it was embarrassing. But she really was drawn to this student. They couldn't really be seen in a friendly atmosphere by any other students, though- no matter how pure she felt her intentions were. That left her one choice. She rummaged through her things and found an old scarf she used when she dusted the apartment and some sunglasses. After locating her sunhat and a housecoat that Caroline used to lounge around in, her disguise was complete.

Yoosung Kim was going to eat quality food. And she was going to bring it to him one way or another. 


	2. Sneaky Business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eilis feeds Yoosung and learns more about him.

Yoosung wasn't sure who was knocking on his door mere seconds before he logged onto LOLOL, but he wasn't very happy about it. He ruffled his hair, agitated, and made the wise decision to at least throw on a pair of pajama bottoms. Playing games in his boxers was usually the highlight of his day. He reached the door opened it calmly. Then he screamed. He wasn't sure who this suspicious person with 90% of their body hidden was, but they were definitely up to something if they were disguised. 

"I don't know what you want, but I'm poor!" He tried his best to look intimidating, but his recent workouts with Zen hadn't exactly started showing on his body yet. Underneath her many layers, Eilis blushed at the sight of the student wearing far less than he'd ever worn in school. She pushed herself in and placed her grocery bags on the table. Yoosung was still eyeing her suspiciously until she whipped off her glasses and hat. Her fiery curls tumbled down like a crimson waterfall. 

"It's just me. I'm going to make you a good dinner! Midterms are tomorrow and I'm sure you're studying so you need good food to get you through...." her voice trailed off. Yoosung was red. She thought she blushed and this boy had a flush going down his neck and chest. He was trying to cover himself. She coughed.

"Sorry--g- go get dressed...." He nodded and made a quick retreat to his room. She felt a bit guilty that she tried so hard to copy the image into her brain. He was skinny, a little lanky, but he had creamy white skin.  _Looks really soft...I bet it is. What kind of body wash does he use?_ She forced her attention back to the task at hand, pulling out a couple of chicken breasts and locating a cutting board to filet them. Yoosung reentered shortly after, sheepishly running his fingers through his hair. It always looked a little messy, but without his signature barrettes, it looked even more disheveled. He had only thrown a shirt on, which was decorated with a shooting star in the lower left corner. 

When Eilis had finished preparing dinner- a simple chicken pasta with lemon and garlic- they sat down at Yoosung's small dining table. It was awkward at first, but they slowly made it through their dishes. After about 15 minutes, she figured she had nothing to lose, so she went for the hard questions first.

"So...what happened at the end of your Freshman year?" She took a sip of her water as she gauged his reaction. He almost choked on a noddle.

"Haahh...right..." He looked so unhappy. She immediately regretted her decision.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to!" She continued in a rush, but he shook his head.

"I'll tell you..." He gobbled up the rest of his food and stood up to clear the table. He thanked her profusely for the food, but there was something very unpleasant in his eyes. He sat back down at the now clean table and ruffled his hair again. 

"I was really close to my cousin...and a lot of stuff happened...but now she has aphasia and I can't really see or talk to her anymore. She's doing some intense therapy, but I don't think she's going to be the same...I just kind of lost my motivation. I couldn't help her..." He looked so sad. Before she could stop herself, she leaned over the tiny table and cradled his head to her chest. He must have taken a shower before she came, because a fruity, delicate scent filled her senses.  _His shampoo...smells good._ She closed her eyes for a moment.

"I'm sorry..." She mumbled, absent- mindedly stroking his head. Yoosung was desperately trying to remember that he was sad. But his body was starting to feel something else with his head in between his teacher's breasts. He knew Eilis had a decently sized chest, but the suits she wore to class did nothing to show their true size. She had to be at least a C cup. He scrambled frantically out of her grasp, once again turning a deep crimson.

"It's- it's okay. I'm doing better now because you're helping me!" She stared at him. He was so effervescent and bright. She couldn't help but return his bubbly smile.

"Right! Now what were you studying before I came over??" She asked, feeling herself get fired up again. His face fell. 

"Uh..actually....I was trying to relax...I study so much with you now..." He looked at his hands. Eilis nodded emphatically.

"Right! Relaxing is important! What do you do to relax?" Yoosung had never met someone as excitable as his teacher was. He was a little embarrassed to admit it, but she seemed so eager to know.

"Um, I play LOLOL..." He mumbled. She gave him a deer in headlights look. 

The rest of Eilis' time at her students small apartment was spent with Yoosung trying to show her all of the cool things about the game. She didn't really understand it, but she enjoyed watching how passionate he was. After much goading and promises of giving her limited edition items, she told him she would download it when she got home. As she was leaving, Eilis thought she should give the younger boy some advice she came by the hard way. When she stepped out into the fresh night air, she turned back to look at him- her sunglasses and hat clutched in her hand.

"Yoosung...I don't know everything that happened with your cousin but...the weight of someone else's burdens can crush you if you aren't careful..." She reached out and gave his hand a quick squeeze before cramming her hair up into her hat and shuffling off. She heard a muffled thanks before the door slowly shut behind her. The echo of the door latching seemed to mock her in her hypocrisy. The recesses of her mind taunted her with unbidden thoughts.  _That's exactly what you did. You crushed her because you couldn't bear the weight. And then you ran away like the coward you are. You left her to die after you'd already destroyed her. Because you weren't strong enough._

When Eilis returned home, Caroline wasn't there- glancing at the clock she realized that it was already midnight. The heaviness in her chest bore down on her soul like an anchor pulling her into the core of the Earth. She felt foolish for giving advice about anything- she should've just kept her mouth shut. She sighed and stripped off her clothes, retreating to the shower to hopefully wash away the thoughts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_"You're such a liar! How could you not know?!"_

_"Sweetheart, I swear I didn't know. Please listen to me..."_

_"No, it's too late! I hate you! Don't touch me!"_

_"Eilis...please. You're all I have left. That man took everything, I can't lose you too."_

_"Then maybe you should die."_

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

"...I wasn't serious, mom...."

The water was cold now. Numbly, she stared at her feet while the water swirled around her toes in little whirlpools. She enjoyed this moment, in a perverse way; she knew she was crying, but the constant stream of water whisked the tears down the drain. She could pretend she was fine until the unbearable gravity of her shame ebbed. When she felt that it had sufficiently settled in a toxic pool in the bottom of her stomach, she reached out to turn the shower off. Droplets made a trail to her room while she mindlessly muddled toward it. When she laid down in bed, she prayed that she would have a dreamless sleep.

It seemed like God was on her side, because woke up feeling refreshed, relishing in the blackness she drifted in while sleeping. She mustered up her usual perky demeanor and ran out the door as she did most mornings with Caroline sleepily waving goodbye. She was motivated and ready for the day, but as the day wore on, she felt herself growing more and more disappointed. Midterms were not going well. Actually, most of her class was doing okay, but one student looked like he was going to get a 0. She frantically checked her e-mail for any notice from Yoosung that he would be absent, but found nothing. He had 30 minutes left for a midterm that had a 2 hour time slot when he finally scrambled through the door. She hurriedly thrust his test at him, noting his bloodshot eyes and dark circles. 

Everyone had finished their test and filed out of the room. Yoosung had 10 minutes left and he was frantically scribbling his answers in. He had filled in about 80% of the test when his time was up. He handed it to her, and she filed it away with the others. Her fingertips brushed his a moment when she peered up at him. 

"Yoosung, is everything okay?" He looked like he was about to cry.

"I found out this morning that Rika is being transferred to a mental hospital here. The program she was in...just gave up on her...." A fat tear rolled down his cheek. Eilis wasn't concerned if any other students saw- she leapt up, bringing herself around to the front of her desk and pulled him close to her. He didn't resist, and laid his head on her shoulder. She could feel his tears soaking her blouse. 

"Why couldn't they fix her?! That's their job..." She couldn't make out anymore of what he said as his words turned into choked sobs. He embraced her, engulfing her. She started to feel a suffocating panic, but pushed it down.  _It's Yoosung, he won't hurt you, calm down. It's okay..._ She never realized how tall he was until this moment. Even though he was crying and vulnerable, she felt dwarfed by him. She breathed slowly, willing her muscles to stop tensing up. They didn't listen until Yoosung pulled back and wiped his eyes on his sleeve.

"I know, it's super unmanly of me to cry like this..." He looked away, the embarrassment showing clearly on his face. His hands settled on her shoulders and clutched them. She realized how gentle he was, despite being upset, his fingers were so light and delicate when they touched her. She shook her head.

"I think it's more manly not to be afraid to cry." She gave him a crooked smile.

"Th- thank you..." He said as he looked down at her. She stared into his eyes- those clear orbs that reminded her of the Northern Lights she had seen once. Before she could stop herself, her toes lifted her up and she placed a soft kiss on his still trembling lips. He was surprised, but he didn't pull back, and leaned into it slowly. When she had come to her senses, she pulled away quickly, almost falling backward in the process.

"Ah! I'm- I'm so sorry...I just...please don't say anything...." She glanced around frantically, hoping that the Midterms kept most students in classrooms around this time. The silence in the halls as she looked out gave her some hope before she turned to face him again. He was red, she knew that she probably matched him, and she tried her best to sound nonplussed and professional. It didn't work when her words escaped in a stutter she thought she had gotten rid of as a child in speech therapy.

"I just mean that...y- you you you-" She cut herself off. That age old frustration with communication made her cheeks blaze bright red. 

"It's okay. I didn't hate it..." Yoosung's voice rang through her angry self loathing and she looked at him again. She amazed at how cool he seemed about it. He smiled that same bright smile again and she returned it. 

"Yeah, me neither." They bid awkward farewells but before he could reach the door, Eilis grasped onto his light blue overshirt- stopping him. 

"Hm?" He asked. 

"T- tomorrow. You'll be hungry, right?"

"Yeah." There goes that pink hue on his cheeks again. This boy was going to be the death of her.

"Okay then. I'll- I'll be there. And tonight I'm...making that...character after I finish grading these so...login...if you want." She mumbled. She suddenly like she was in elementary school again with her first crush. She focused on her feet in their sensible loafers before his eyes lit up- almost blindingly so.

"Don't worry! I will be!" He looked so victorious when he tromped out of the room, all of her fright and embarrassment was forgotten. She gathered her things and tucked the tests into her bag. When she walked through the campus, she reveled in the airy scent of the trees surrounding her, and felt as if her steps were as light as a flower petal drifting on a Spring breeze. 

 

 


	3. LoLoL...wtf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yoosung shows a different side of himself when he tries to teach Eilis how to play.

Caroline stared at the computer screen from behind her roommate, lazily sipping her before work beer. 

"So what...you're like an elf or something?" Eilis blanched.

"Y- yeah...he just told me that it would be good...because he's a...warrior..."

"He?" Caroline peered at her suspiciously, "You aren't talking about your student, are you?" If Eilis got any whiter, she would disappear. "Jesus, Ei- I didn't know you were going to pull this when I told you to tutor him. I really meant tutor! What are you going to do if you lose your job?" She slammed the still cold can down on the computer desk, splashing a drop onto the other woman's hand in the process. 

She angrily rubbed her hand on the cushy computer chair before replying. "What about you, Ms. Drinks Beer Before Work? Isn't it against company rules?"

"To drink ON the job, yes. But I'm not doing that, now am I? Besides, I'm not hiding out like you are..." The red head twitched at the reminder. Caroline felt a little guilty. "I just don't want you to get hurt. But I want you to be happy. If you like this kid, that's fine, just...be careful, okay?" She tried her best to soften her usually crass voice. It seemed to work, because Eilis gave her a smile and a nod before turning red.

"Thank you..ah! But- I don't really like him like that...I don't think." 

"You look cute when you panic," Caroline teased, "but honestly...I've never seen you pick up a video game in your life. Either you like this guy or you have a brain tumor. So I'd really prefer it if you just liked him." She sauntered off with her drink to get dressed for her glamorous life cleaning offices. Eilis watched her retreat and felt the sincerity in her friend's words. She shook her head.  _I can't focus on that now! I am going to be a level 1 elf mage or something!I'm just doing this because I need an outlet! I need to relax!_

After the first hour of playing with Yoosung, she accepted that she would either be a nervous wreck for the rest of her life, or she couldn't play with him anymore. She didn't have a headset for any kind of voice chatting, but the constant flurry of capital letters in the text chat made her happy she couldn't hear the innocent voice behind them.

Superman Yoosung: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?! YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY!!!

Lady Ei: ehhh???? I'm sorry T_T

Superman Yoosung: STOP TYPING AND JUST GO. GOOOOOO!!!!!!

Superman Yoosung: OMg

Superman Yoosung: OMG WTF

Superman Yoosung: THAT'S NOT HOW YOU USE THAT SPELL.

Superman Yoosung: WHERE IS OUR HEALER?!?! 

Nurse Jackie: right here...I can't keep up with her. She's only a level one, dude.

Superman Yoosung: OH OH OH I'M SO SORRY. I THOUGHT I WAS THE GUILD MASTER HERE. MY MISTAKE YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU MAKE ALL THE DECISIONS, JACKIE.

Nurse Jackie: Fine, calm down. I guess I'll just follow her around. I hope you have enough shit to heal yourself if you need it....

Superman Yoosung: I'M FINE DON'T LET HER DIE.

Lady Ei: T_____T

When the game ended, Eilis stared at the black screen. She had said her goodbyes and immediately shut off her computer. She didn't think she could ever feel that tense...or that sweet Yoosung would ever be that brutal. As she was getting ready for bed, though, she relished in learning one more new and interesting thing about him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yoosung felt so accomplished after getting Eilis through some intense leveling. No one else had ever really taken an interest in LoLoL except for Seven, and he mostly just played to mess with him when he was bored. He glanced at his phone and realized he didn't even have her number. Not that he needed it. She was his teacher, so she would get the wrong idea if he asked her.  _But there was that kiss..._ his cheeks reddened at the memory. The feeling of her lips, soft and warm, still burned in his memories.  _Maybe it's a thing foreigners do...she's not from here...._

After much debating, he decided to sign into the RFA chat room. 

 

-Yoosung has entered the chatroom-

 

[Yoosung]: Seven, Jumin- I need your help!

[707]: 707 is the master of all things! How can I help you? <3

[Yoosung]: Have you ever been to another country?

[Jumin]: I've been many places for business and pleasure. There's a particular facility that produces catnip in France that Elizabeth the 3rd is quite fond of...

[Zen]: No one cares about you drugging up your cat -_-

[Jumin]: If you mean to suggest that it is harming her in any way, she is more important than life itself to me. But I understand that you do not know much about caring for another.

[Zen]: I'm more of a romantic than you are!

[Jumin]: Really? Let's ask your girlfriend...oh...oh my. THERE DOESN'T SEEM TO BE ONE. 

[707]: Or any. Ever. The cruel life of a famous actor T_T

[Zen]: ugh....T_T

[Yoosung]: Can we get back on topic, please?

[Jumin]: My apologies. What was your question?

[Yoosung]: So...in other countries...is it normal to kiss people? Like, politely?

[Jumin]: In some it is.

[707]: *gasp* did our sweet little Yoosung get a kiss?? <3 It might depend where the kiss was....;)

[Zen]: Seven...what the Hell?

[Jumin]: Well, he's not wrong. There are European countries that give a polite kiss or two on the cheek.

[Yoosung]: But not anywhere else?

[Zen]: Oh my, Yoosung- what are you trying to tell us?

[707]: Did someone take advantage of our baby boy?

[Yoosung]: UGH >_< It was on the lips. Stop oit

[707]: *gasp* the typos...

-Yoosung has left the chatroom-

He threw his phone on the bed and scratched his head impatiently. He had never really been good with girls. He was always too afraid of hurting their feelings before he got too close. His mom had ingrained such a protective instinct in him that he tended to treat a lot of women as if they were tiny glass figurines. He didn't mind getting close to his teacher- she was actually really cute when she could be herself. Even when she was in the classroom, she was strict, but seemed like she genuinely loved what she did. Obviously, her eyes and hair were extremely beautiful. Her hair had a natural copper sheen to it, while her eyes were the purest evergreen shade. Whenever she was excited, her hair would bounce with the rest of her- her curls were like tiny springs and sometimes he would imagine what it would feel like to run his hands through them...he blushed furiously and tried to push the thoughts from his mind. He went to sleep early, with his thoughts swirling around in his brain like a blizzard.

It was a blizzard that she hoped would ebb by the next day, but when that time came and he sat down for Ms. Hannity's class, he found that his productive morning was just the eye of the storm. She breezed in with her fluffy persona and succeeded in making him pay complete attention to her without actually hearing a damn word she said. All he could focus on were her lips, which became slightly glossy whenever her tongue dipped out occasionally to moisten them. He had to hold back a groan when she pulled her hair up into a ponytail, bending over in the process. She still had professional attire on, so her cleavage was minimal, but it reminded him of being pressed against them when she consoled him the other night. She had smelled like cotton candy- such a feminine, cheerful scent. When class ended, he looked frantically at his agenda, realizing that it was a tutoring day.

"Yoosung! Are you ready? What do you want to study today?" She asked as she sat in the seat next to him. He squeaked and jumped up, trying desperately to hide his lap with his messenger bag. 

"Actually, I uh...I can't do today, I'm sorry..." He tried to make a quick retreat, but he should've known it wouldn't be that easy. She was pretty quick to grab his hand.

"What's wrong?" She was so concerned. He couldn't blame her. But he wished that she knew how crazy this was making him. He tried in vain to remove himself from her grasp, but she wouldn't budge.

"Please...let me go..."His voice was meek, but much deeper and raspy than he intended it to be. He tried to think of anything to calm his body down. He was grateful when she let him go, but she only walked around him and closed the door to the classroom- looking at him defiantly.

"I won't let you leave until I know you're okay." He finally lost his resolve and dropped his bag on the floor. Papers flew out of it but he didn't care. He gingerly took her head into his arms and dipped his fingers through her hair. If he was going to scare her off, at least he was going to find out what that felt like. 

"Yoosung, what're you-"

"Why did you kiss me?" He said simply. Her head was resting on his chest and he knew she could feel his heartbeat going a million miles an hour. He kept his lower half a respectable distance from her. He definitely wasn't going to give her the idea that he wanted to force himself on her. A few moments passed while he indulged his fingers through her springy curls. 

"I don't know..." She mumbled into his shirt, desperately trying to hide her quickly reddening face. Yoosung's hands ended their exploration in her hair and stopped at the junction between her head and neck. Slight pressure from them encouraged her to tilt her face up to look at him. As much as his head screamed that this was a bad idea, he ignored it and dipped his head down to meet her lips with his. It was a gentle, slightly inexperienced kiss as first, but Eilis opened her lips ever so slightly and he took the opportunity to slide his tongue in to taste hers. Eilis marveled that everything he did was so careful. As if every action carried with it a silent question of 'is this okay?' She deepened the kiss more before common sense was finally able to wake her up. Both Yoosung and her stepped back, breathing heavily. His...problem down there had only been made worse and Eilis tried her best to divert her attention away while he squeaked a goodbye and gathered his bag. 

He walked towards the door, but stopped when he came up next to her. He was careful to keep his voice barely audible when he asked her, "are you...still coming over tonight?" He felt guilty at the inner battle she seemed to be waging as she considered her answer.

"Yes." She replied.


	4. Close for Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner #2 and Yoosung surprises his teacher with his cooking skills. Zen gives Yoosung some advice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *warning* for this chapter, there's a bit of smut in the beginning because I'm a sinful fangirl and I couldn't resist.

Yoosung was really excited to see who he now conceded was his crush. With that in mind, he decided that he would be the one to cook for her. He liked cooking- he just couldn't afford the ingredients. He got home from school and immediately cleared his apartment of the various debris he accumulates from his marathon gaming sessions. When the crumbs and cans of his sordid lifestyle were cleaned up, he was actually pretty proud of himself. He realized he had about an hour before her last class ended for the day, so he thought he would text Zen for some advice.

Yoosung: Hey Zen, can I ask you something?

Yoosung: I didn't want to ask in the messenger...it's kind of embarrassing.

Zen: What's up?

Yoosung: I have kind of a date tonight...any advice?

Zen: Do you like her a lot? Is she cute?

Yoosung: Um...yes to both...

Zen: Take care of the beast beforehand.

Yoosung: The...what?!

Zen: You know...the BEAST. You don't want to be constantly worried about something like that, do you?

Yoosung: Oh God...you mean my...

Zen: Yes. That.

Yoosung. Um...ok thanks...

Zen: :)

Zen: Have fun! Tell me how it goes~ you can always come to me for relationship advice.

 

Yoosung felt how hot his face had gotten.  _Should I really do that?_ He wasn't very skilled in that area. He had done it a couple times when he first started living alone, but it always left a hollow feeling in his stomach. But when he remembered how hard it was to think straight earlier in the day with just memories of being close to her, he resigned himself. He went into his room and sat on his bed, stripping off his layers of clothing. When he was fully nude, he looked down at himself. He had started to get some definition in his legs and abs- not enough that anyone else would notice, but he was proud to see it. Slowly, as he stroked the area around his crotch, his thoughts turned to Eilis.  _What would she feel like? She's so bubbly...I wonder if she's like that in bed too..._ His erection slowly started rising and when it was hard enough, he grasped it firmly. That first rush of unbridled pleasure made him shiver.

He thought she would be a little crazy in bed. He wondered if she liked tying people up. He didn't think he would mind that from her. In his most vulnerable moments, he could admit that he was probably a bit of a masochist. He had never had sex before, but he always got excited at the thought of being controlled and mildly degraded by a woman. He thought of his teacher- his sweet, but strict pedagogue- chastising him for getting a bad grade. He could almost hear the whack of a ruler on his bare bottom. He started pumping faster as he dove deeper into his fantasy.

_"Yoosung...really. I thought you were smarter than this. Don't you know what happens to bad students?"  They were both situated in the classroom, gentle evening sunlight breaking through the windows. Yoosung adjusted his shirt and rubbed his stinging flesh where the ruler had come crashing down. He reached for his pants around his ankles but she stopped him with another swat of the instrument- this time on his hand. "You didn't answer my question." She said simply, her lips were stained a rich blood red that complimented her hair._

_"Bad students...get punished?" He said weakly, unable to hide his excitement. She noticed it as well, and glided the ruler down to lift up his junk- still constricted in his boxer briefs. She looked at it, contemplating, measuring, judging him. Her scrutiny mixed with the gentle prodding only caused him to get harder. She smiled a wicked smile._

_"That's right, they do. But you like that, don't you? You stupid boy...did you really think I wouldn't notice?"  He gulped. She traced a fingernail down his cheek and left a bright red kiss at the side of his mouth before scrunching his cheeks painfully together. "Well, since you've been having so much fun, I think you owe me some fun of my own." She stripped off her modest teaching attire to reveal skimpy lace lingerie. It was red, everything about her was so blindingly, brilliantly red. She smiled, kissing him gently before forcing him onto his knees. He winced as a stiletto heel propped itself up onto his shoulder with little regard for comfort. He looked up at the deepest, most intimate part of her- covered only by a thin sheet of lace. He reached up to remove it, but his hand was swatted once again. "You really are an idiot. Don't use your hands." Her voice had taken on an even lustier, more visceral tone than before._

_He brought his teeth up gently to pull down the fabric, and reveled in the taste of her. She was so very wet and he was so very ready to please her. He looked up at her domineering emerald eyes. "May I?" he asked. She smiled a toothy grin and nodded. Her head whipped back as he attacked her core. He lapped up the juices like a man dying from thirst in the desert. Her hands were tangled in his hair and she was murmuring encouraging words to him. He explored every fold and every nook with his tongue. Every part of her, expect for one. He worked his tongue inside her, fervently probing the damp cavern. Her moans grew more desperate, and her nails started digging into his scalp. He winced at the stiletto burrowing further into his shoulder. He felt the skin bruising there and it only made him hungrier._

_She jerked his head away suddenly, and he looked up at her, confused. She didn't say anything and simply used her foot to urge him onto the cold wooden floor. She ripped his boxer briefs and let his painful erection finally spring free. She brought her lips up to his ear, "Just be a good boy and lay here..." she whispered. He felt jolts of electricity going down his spine and travelling straight to his dick. She adjusted herself to hover above him, but seemed to be as impatient as he was. Her hips came crashing down on his as she took every inch of him inside of her. She rode him, her nails digging little crescent shapes into his pale flesh- turning it red. He thought he could last forever like this with her. She cried out and her bouncing on his cock came faster, more relentless. "FUCK- YOOSUNG!" She screamed and that was it for him. He came undone inside her as he watched her come down from the high of her own orgasm._

Yoosung stared at the white liquid covering his hand. He grabbed some tissues and quickly wiped it off. He was breathing heavily and his head still felt fuzzy. He felt a little shameful at all of the things he had imagined his teacher doing, but oddly enough, that sense of overwhelming emptiness didn't reach him. Overall, he felt pretty good. He dressed himself in some nice clothes- khakis and a blue button-up shirt- and tidied up the apartment some more. 

When she arrived, Yoosung felt like his stomach was in knots. He opened up the door and saw that she had changed, too. She still had on her ridiculous head wear to hide her face, but she also wore a tight-fitting bodycon dress. _Red..._ he thought, unable to stop himself from looking her all over.  She removed her disguise and set down the ingredients for dinner. She was surprised when Yoosung whisked them away from her. 

"Um..I'm actually not a bad cook. So, if it's okay with you, I'd like to cook dinner." He smiled brilliantly at her and she was taken aback by how confident and relaxed he seemed. She smiled back, "sure! Let me know if you need any help." He seemed so excited at her approval that she had to hold back a giggle. He set right to work with the ingredients she brought and some that he already had on hand. While he didn't make the recipe she had been planning, he made something equally good. She was impressed with the appetizing aroma wafting through the small space. She poured a couple of glasses of wine while Yoosung set their plates. 

While dinner was slightly less awkward than the first time, there was still a heavy silence hanging between them. Eilis hoped that wine would ease the situation a bit, and after her 3rd glass and all of her dinner had been taken care of, she felt that it had helped a bit. Yoosung was on his 4th glass and looked slightly unsteady as he brought their plates to the sink. 

"Are you alright?" she asked, feeling slightly hypocritical since she was certain she was more tipsy than he was.

"Me? Yeah, I'm fine." He filled two glasses with some water and handed her one. She mumbled a thanks and gulped it down while he did the same. 

"So..." She started, "We should talk..." She felt a pang of guilt at his panicked face and hurried to continue. "It's nothing bad! It's- it's- it's just...I- I think that I might li- li- li-"  _shit- that fucking stutter again_. She stared at her hands, frustrated that the wine hadn't broken her of the habit. She decided to try again, "I- I- I..." She could feel tears about to well up when a warm, gentle hand came to cover her clenched ones. She looked at him and he was giving her a heart- wrenching smile. 

"I like you, too. A lot." He blushed as he said the last words. She felt the weight of her fears dissipate at hearing that. She furrowed her brows.

"But I'm still your teacher! So I won't give you special treatment." She said sternly. He laughed. 

"No problem." 

"And we can't be seen in public, so until the class is over, this is the only way we can meet."

"We can still see each other in LOLOL, though, right?" She looked him in the face like a war veteran with PTSD.

"You play too rough." Yoosung was shocked. Okay, he wasn't exactly shocked, but he gave her a mock hurtful gasp anyway.

"Whaaat?? I just wanted to help youuu." She laughed and slapped his shoulder. He somehow used the teasing to convince her to play as his character for a bit, which she actually had moderately more fun with. The wine had helped Yoosung relax so he only yelled a couple of times. Slowly, the evening whittled down into the two snuggled up on the couch watching movies. Eilis's head dipped and she fell asleep nestled in the nook of Yoosung's arm. 


	5. Rotten Seeds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yoosung learns some unpleasant things about Eilis.

_The hands roamed over her body. They were rough and unforgiving. Like a raging forest fire, the fingertips succeeded in razing her defiance to the ground. Everything she had once been was left in cinders as he relentlessly pounded her weakness into her. She looked up and saw nothing but black. Black eyes, black walls, a black heart. There was nothing left. She turned her head to the side and shut her eyes so his breath wouldn't sting her as he wheezed heavily. His hot, sticky breathe was suffocating her, and engulfing her. She couldn't breathe, and found that his hands were grasping her neck. His wedding ring glinted in an unseen light, and his black eyes glared at her hatefully. She scrambled, her small hands desperately trying to pry the fingers off of her throat. She felt rooted to the spot, paralyzed. Then he started shaking her. The blackness started ebbing in his face and he seemed concerned._

_"Eilis, are you okay? Eilis!"_

"EILIS!" Her eyes popped open, and she scanned the room frantically. She remembered that she was at Yoosung's, and had fallen asleep. When she managed to bring her face to look at his, he was almost crying. She brought her hand up to rub the thin sheen of sweat that had covered her forehead. 

"I'm...okay." She said, trying to muster her most positive smile. Yoosung relaxed a bit, but brought her face in to rest against his chest. She could feel how scared he was with how fast his heart was still pumping. 

"I don't think you're okay...you were screaming...gasping...I thought you were having an asthma attack in your sleep..." She buried her face into his shirt- covering herself in the fruity, sweet scent that was all him. 

"Yoosung...would you ever want to be with someone that couldn't be intimate?" She had practiced this line so many times throughout the years, that her nervous stutter was held at bay. He was silent, and she felt the disappointment rising in her chest.

"Well, I think that would be okay...but I would want to know why. I can't ignore that you seem really hurt right now. It's not like you..." 

"To be honest...I- I thought that tonight we might....be- be- be..." She sighed, frustrated. "Well, you know. But, some...things...happened a long time ago and I'm not sure if I can. I- I- I- I'll talk about th- those things someday, m- maybe." She managed to choke out the best confession she could garner at the moment. He just stroked her back in large circles, lulling her back to sleep.

"I'll be here no matter what..." He mumbled into her hair. They both drifted off like that, still embracing on the couch. For the first time in almost 20 years, she had pleasant dreams. She dreamed about the time before her father died, when he had taken her and her mother to a butterfly farm. The brightness of the colors resonated through her soul, and she laughed when he picked her up and held her high so she could survey the rainbow- colored world he had brought to her. 

The scent of pancakes and bacon drifted through her world of butterflies until she finally blinked awake. She was still in her incredibly uncomfortable dress, but was covered in a fleece blanket that was swarming with the scent of the college boy she had come to care for. It was so comforting, despite being on a couch and still in her date-night dress. Alas, the promise of delicious food dragged her off the couch. She soon felt her engines revving and within moments she was bouncing to the now set table. Yoosung grinned at her as he poured her some coffee.

"GOOD MORNING!" Eilis blurted out. She hadn't even had her coffee yet, but her natural hyperactivity was in full swing. Especially since she had such a good dream- she was feeling absolutely wonderful. Also, there was bacon.

"Good morning." Yoosung responded, a bit more calm than she. It was a nice breakfast, and a tradition that would continue for the next few weeks. Once a week, like clockwork, they settled into a schedule of dinner- sleepover- breakfast. When the semester's end was looming in the distance, they felt like they had been running a marathon and were finally about to reach the finish line. As nice as their dates had been, they wanted to be a real couple, doing real things that couples do. Yoosung had been dying to introduce her to the other RFA members after he had told her so much about them. 

Eilis found herself disliking Rika as time went on. She had never met her, but anytime Yoosung would visit her, he came back looking like an abused puppy. The last time he saw her, Rika had thrown something at him and caused a bruise to well up next to his left eye. Eilis seethed while she nursed it.

"What if she had hit your eye?! You've been working so hard to be a vet- she could have ruined your career before it even started!" Yoosung had trouble understanding her. Whenever Eilis got really mad, an Irish lilt would come out in her speech, mangling her words. He got the gist of it, though, and tried to comfort her as best he could. He stroked her arms while her hands went to work bandaging his wound.

"It's alright, she didn't- did she? She's just...confused. Normally she won't even talk. But sometimes...it's like a light flickers on and she just gets enraged. I'm not sure if she even really knows who she's mad at anymore..." There it was- the sad puppy dog face again. Eilis clenched her teeth. She finished her nursing with a light kiss on the fresh bandage.

"If she ever hurts you again, so help me God, I'll find her." 

"Okay." Yoosung conceded, knowing his girlfriend wouldn't hurt a fly.

"Rika...feckin' gobshite." She mumbled as she put away her first aid kit. Yoosung was always excited to see this side of her. She had blended in so well with Korean society, that it was hard to remember that she wasn't a native. She had obvious physical characteristics that gave her away, but when you spoke to her, you just assumed that she was raised there by foreign parents. Yoosung assumed that, and it was like pulling teeth just to get her to admit what her birth country was; and she would only do so under strict secrecy. It was reminding him a lot of Seven before everything about his past came to light. Which prompted his next question.

"Hey Eilis, are you a secret agent or running from someone?" She flinched.

"Yes and no. I'm not a secret agent but I have a complicated family life." She gave him a forced smile. He knew better than to push when it came to that topic, so he let it go. At least she wasn't a secret agent.

"Let me take a picture of you." He said suddenly. They had been very careful not to have any evidence of being together like this until now. "I won't be in it- it'll be just you but...I would like to have one..." he blushed and she felt like her heart was about to leap out of her chest. It should be illegal to be that cute- he could rob banks if he just walked in and asked nicely. She acquiesced.

"All right..." She smiled slightly for the yellow cellphone camera. 

"Cool! Now I can at least show my friends what you look like!" She felt panic rising in her gut.

"Um, Yoosung...I'm not sure if that's a good idea..."

"It's okay! It's a super secure server. No one will see. None of them go to school with me, either." He was so excited...she relented to that as well, joining him in his excitement. 

Later that day, after his teacher had left, he couldn't wait to sign on and show everyone her picture.

-Yoosung has entered the chatroom-

[Yoosung]: Guys!

[Jaehee]: Not just guys here.

[Emma]: Yeah- be considerate :,( 

[707]: I didn't realize you were so sexist, baby Yoosung >_<

[Yoosung]: Ugh...sorry. Guys and girls!

[Jaehee]: Better.

[Emma]: We accept. 

[Yoosung]: Anyways, I got a picture of her! My girlfriend!

[Jumin]: So she actually exists? 

[Yoosung]...yes >_<

[Yoosung]: 

[Yoosung]: Isn't she pretty???

[707]: Wow...good job +_+

[Jumin]:...

[Jumin]: What did you say her last name was?

[Yoosung]: Hannity...why?

[Jumin]: Nothing. I must have her confused with someone else.

-Jumin Han has left the chatroom-

[Emma]: Well, that was a bit ominous....

[Yoosung]: I'm going to go call him T_T

-Yoosung has left the chatroom-

Yoosung couldn't dial the corporate heir's phone number fast enough. After a couple of ignored attempts, Jumin finally picked up. 

"I know it may be hard for you to believe, but I'm actually very busy." He said curtly. 

"Why did you say that in the chatroom?!" Yoosung was just pissed now. To say something like that and then just leave like he did...of course it would freak someone out. There was a heavy sigh at the other end of the line.

"It's not my place. You should talk to her about it." 

"So you DO know something!" 

"I MIGHT know something. I'm not even sure if it's the right person I'm thinking of." Jumin corrected.

"Well fine, tell me SOMETHING about this person..." Yoosung was almost pleading. He knew practically nothing about Eilis before she came to Korea. What if she was a murderer on the run or something?

"When I was younger, my father told me about a media circus that caused an extremely successful distillery to come to ruin. The owner of the distillery married a woman with a child. That child claimed that she had been sexually abused for many years and this resulted in a bitter divorce. The allegations of abuse and the allure of a multimillion dollar divorce settlement kept the media focused on the girl and her mother for months. The mother ended up committing suicide, and no one could find the girl after that. She was legally pronounced dead when no trace could be found."

"But- you don't know if it's her."

"No, I don't. The last name would have been O' Cooley- not Hannity." Yoosung thanked Jumin for telling him everything and hung up the phone slowly. He wanted more than anything for Jumin to have the wrong person. But the sinking feeling in his stomach told him that he didn't. 


	6. Blooming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yoosung confronts Eilis about what he's learned.
> 
> There's smut so if you aren't into that kind of thing, skip this chapter, yo.

She knew that she wasn't going to like what was going to happen. Yoosung had called her almost 5 days ahead of their carefully planned date night and did everything short of demanding too see her. She hated the strangled tone to his voice- as if he hadn't slept, had been crying, or both. Her heart thrummed a steady undercurrent of panic as she knocked on his door. Her obscured face still betrayed her worry when he opened it and ushered her inside. After relieving herself of the ridiculous getup, she waited patiently on the small couch that they had slept on only a day before. She had to stop herself from smiling- he looked so stern, but he was so gentle and kind that it was completely gap moe for him. This feeling was quickly dispelled when he spoke up.

"What's your name?" She swallowed.

"Eilis H- Hannity..." She answered cautiously.

"No...your real name." He stared her down before she looked away.

"Obviously you already know, s- so..."

"Why couldn't you be honest with me?" He asked, sitting beside her. She wasn't prepared for him to be SAD, but that DID sound more like him than being angry with her. "Am I really that unreliable?" He focused on his socked feet shuffling on the carpet. She felt like her heart was going to shatter into a million little pieces.

"N- NO! I...I was just...ashamed..." She finished

"About what?" He asked, happy that she was going to continue the conversation.

"First...HOW MUCH...do you know?" Her wide eyes stared at him frightfully when he listed off the paragraph that described the worst part of her life. She grimaced, taking a moment to compose herself before continuing.

"I- I told my mother to- to- k- k-" She took a deep breath. She gripped his hand in her own, trying to find the strength to tell him the worst secrets she didn't even want to admit to herself. "I blamed my mother for some things that happened and I told her to kill herself." She was not proud of the confession, but happy that it came out in one unbroken line of dialogue. He squeezed her hand and pulled her close to his chest. She was flustered that sometimes she saw him as a boy, because in these moments, when he held her like this, he was so very much the man that his age belied him to be.

"Everyone says things they don't mean. I know your mom is up there and I don't think that she would be happy to see you broken up like this. I understand why you were afraid to tell me, but trust me when I say that I would never let anyone hurt you..." She smiled, nuzzled up against him. His hand made comforting circles on her back.

He slowly continued his reassuring ministrations. After a few moments, it stirred up a feeling in her that she never thought she'd feel. Maybe it was the freedom of finally knowing that he knew who she really was, or the comfort that he was always able to bring her, but she slowly brought her face to meet his and pressed her lips on his own. He let out a small sigh at the contact and she dipped her tongue into his mouth. 

They kissed, deeply, longingly for a few minutes, enjoying every taste and sensation that it brought. When she slipped her hand under his shirt to trace the contours of his body, she wanted him to remember what she had said the other night. She wasn't sure if she could ever be intimate with anyone, but she was here, with him, and it was the only thing on her mind. She lightly traced his lily white skin with her nails, eliciting a chaste gasp from him. When her lips traveled to his neck, he gripped her wrists, panting and pushed her back slightly.

"If...if you keep going, it's going to be really hard for me..." She smirked at his choice in words and kissed his forehead softly. 

"Yoosung, it's okay. Just be gentle...please..." She felt herself getting embarrassed as the realization of what she was asking him dawned on his face. He turned beet red and yelped when she turned her attention back to his neck. She sucked and nibbled lightly, enjoying the groans tumbling from his throat. He desperately tried to keep rational thought in place.

"A- are you sure? Because I've never...EEP!" She pushed him back against the couch planted herself on his lap. She was about as red as he was, but still she forged ahead. She didn't know if she would ever come to want this, but now that she knew she did, it consumed her completely. 

"I know. It's okay..." She brought his earlobe between her lips and gave it a light love bite before continuing, "Just do what comes natural..." Her voice came out throatier, more lusty than she'd ever heard it. Before she could analyze herself too much, the man below her stood up, picking her up with him. She was surprised that she could lift her so easily, but wrapped her legs around him anyway as he wordlessly carried her to his room. He laid her out onto his small bed with her hair spilled around her like fields of ripened strawberries. She was absolutely the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He shook his head, trying again to focus. He lit a candle next to his bed that emitted a vanilla scent as the wick burned, then he turned off the light. She was bathed in the natural light streaming through the windows as well as the glow from the candle. He had fantasies, sure, but nothing could compare to this vision before him. 

He slowly stripped off her shirt, kissing every inch of skin that was exposed. She had a pyramid shaped birthmark on her left breast, and light freckles that he had never been close enough to see before. The red flush on her skin emboldened him, and he kissed her urgently while he stripped off his own shirt. She spread her legs, and he easily slid between them, no longer worried about his desperate manhood pushing against his jeans. His nimble fingers traced her sides and he loved hearing the new variety of sounds he could elicit from her. He could feel her wetness as he brushed against her panties. She had worn a skirt, but while he could easily hike it up and ignore it, he wanted to make sure this was perfect. He had always been a romantic, so his first time had to be what he always envisioned. He unbottoned it and slid it down off of her thighs. She was wearing adorably pink and lacy panties that matched her bra, and he grew harder just staring at her writhing so illicitly with such innocent undergarments on. He gripped the thin cloth and met her eyes. 

"M- May I?" He asked, his amethyst eyes boring into her. Coherent speech wasn't possible, so she just nodded. He pulled them off as easily as her skirt and greedily stared at her. She reached up and removed her bra before he could do so. If he thought she was beautiful before, she was a freaking goddess now. Also, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that she was a natural redhead. His gaming always made him fairly good with his fingers, and Eilis learned this as soon as they delved into her womanhood- gently teasing the small nub there and making her feel a wonderful menagerie of sensations- all new and unexplored. His other hand played with her nipples, tweaking and twirling them. He wet the pad of his finger briefly before returning. The new feeling of the air hitting her now wet nipple made her arch her back into his touch. 

He thought he was going to go insane if he didn't feel her soon. He stripped off his pants and boxers and covered Eilis with his body. She was afraid it would feel stifling and frightening, but his warmth radiated onto her and she just felt loved and desired. Is this what it was supposed to feel like? This utter devotion and surrender to another person? He tentatively stroked her hair behind her ear and traced little circles down her neck. She could feel his hardness pressing up against the apex of her thighs. Experimentally, she pressed them together, enjoying the sound of his groan as she did so. His breath was hot, needy, but controlled. She watched the muscles in his chest flex with anticipation. She knew what he was waiting for, but wanted this pristine moment to last for just a heartbeat longer. 

_ba_

His eyes meet hers, pleading, while his tongue darts out to lick his lips.

_dum_

A sharp intake of breath as he ruts against her uninhibitedly, accidentally. He blushes furiously.

She takes his smooth cheeks between her hands. "I'm ready." And she never saw more relief in his eyes. He still maintains control as he slides into her. She winces, but is quickly able to readjust. The fullness of the man she loved was awe-inspiring. His deep, lazy thrusts were so calculated and cautious. The sweat on his brow dripped onto her birthmark and slid between the expanse of her breasts. 

He dipped his hand between them and played with her again. She felt something building up within her as the pad of his thumb rubbed the fleshy pebble there. He kissed her again, his thrusts gaining some speed at the sound of her wanton moaning. Was that really her? Her voice sounded so completely alien to her ears as the pressure in her belly continued to build. She dipped her fingers through his hair, relishing in the softness of it that was in stark contrast to the hardness of every other part of him right now. Her nails clawed into his shoulders, and she took note that he moaned EXTREMELY loud as they dug in. She couldn't dwell on that tidbit too long, though, because her thighs clenched and she arched her back erratically as she had the first orgasm of her life.

Yoosung felt her tight walls clench around him and he whispered her name like a prayer repeatedly while he desperately buried himself within her again and again. She bit his shoulder possessively- a bit harder than she intended, but that did him in. A raspy cry emitted from his throat as he released inside of her, feeling like he was going to fill her to the brim with how urgently he had wanted this. She kissed his forehead and cheeks as he rode out the final spurts of his own orgasm.

He collapsed on top of her and she stroked his hair lovingly. She found a hint of his natural brown hair in his roots and smiled. "I was wondering if you were one of those guys who had mismatched carpets and drapes...I didn't know you were a natural brunette..." He blushed and hid his face, trying to maintain a modicum of manliness but pretty much failing due to every part of his brain being fried at the moment. She just giggled and pulled the sheet up around them. He adjusted himself into a more comfortable position and they both found that her head fit perfectly on the expanse of his chest.

"I love you...Yoosung..." Eilis mumbled exhaustedly. 

"I love you too, Eilis." He smiled, closing his eyes. 


	7. Threat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eilis has one more demon that needs to be conquered.

Yoosung managed to get through Eilis' class successfully without any suspicion being aroused that anything was going on. Eilis transferred to a new college so that Yoosung could continue his studies at the place he was most comfortable. Being able to date out in the open was the greatest gift for either of them. Eilis could enjoy being out in the sun with a boy who seemed like the physical embodiment of sunshine. She could ruffle his hair and tease him by pinching his butt around strangers and watch that adorable shade his cheeks turned when she did so. Yoosung got to enjoy Eilis' jealousy when a girl would give him a flirty look. He liked that she wasn't intimidated and would possessively grip his hand. He felt the same way when men looked at Eilis like that, but decided to try to keep his yandere tendencies under control. Though he did fantasize a time or two about punching their teeth into their throats.

Yoosung still visited Rika, but had been doing so less. She seemed to occasionally come back to the real her- not the angry, confused Rika- but the kindhearted cousin he had loved. One particular visit didn't go like the others had, though. Yoosung would try to talk about his life, but kept it centralized around people and things that Rika was already familiar with. For that reason, he had never brought up Eilis at all. As he was recounting his grades for the semester, her eyes suddenly lit up.

"Who is Eilis?" She asked, concern etching her voice. Yoosung was dumbfounded and could only stare. Finally, after a few moments, he choked out, "Where did you hear that name...?" He said it so quietly, it was almost a whisper, but Rika heard it all the same.

"Someone came to visit me. He asked if I knew you, or her. He seemed..." She started to trail off as her moment of clarity faded. The aphasia was back, and his cousin was gone again as the light in her eyes dulled. He felt guilty for cutting his visit so short, but he signaled the nurses and they escorted him out. He dialed his girlfriend's number frantically, and was sent to voicemail. He redialed several times with the same agonizing result.

Meanwhile, Eilis was a bit tied up- literally. She felt her childlike fear creeping through every pore of her body like poisonous vines. She had been crying for a solid hour while her roommate was unconscious. Caroline's eyes finally flitted open and she breathed a sigh of relief. She even had to bite back a chuckle of happiness when her friend exclaimed, "WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK?!" It was good to see that she was still herself- albeit without a beer in hand. 

"It's my former stepdad. He was waiting here for me when I got home from shopping and I just...I'm s- s- sorry..." Her words stilted as her throat tightened up. The last thing she wanted was anyone else to be dragged into this mess. Caroline was just concerned for her friend...and her skin. Because the duct tape he had tied her up with was not exactly gentle. 

"Ei- it's okay. Don't worry about me. We'll get through this." She made a brave smile in an attempt to awaken the perky, caffeine- infused personality that Eilis usually wore, but to no avail. Her friend's legs started to shake as footsteps could be heard coming to the door. They had both been secluded to Eilis' modest bedroom, and close quarters made the scene both comforting and claustrophobic. When the door creaked open, Caroline laid her eyes on the word 'grizzled' come to life. He was a tall but sturdy man with a heavy tan trench coat and hair and skin the same shade as Eilis. The only difference was that everything seemed horribly dull and listless on him. He was like a man that was just roused from his grave. He seemed oddly clean and well groomed, but so very tired looking at the same time. With the way Eilis' soul seemed to drift away, she knew that this was the man she had been running from. 

"Sweetheart...it was so hard to find you...." He drawled as he stalked towards the comparatively small small woman fixed to the chair. His heavily freckled hand gripped her face roughly, and he turned it from side to side, as if he were carefully inspecting a prized horse. She didn't have any will to fight, and only stared ahead. She teared up as his grip tightened. "I spent every penny I had left to find you, did you know that?" She continued staring until he clutched her curls and yanked her head to the side, exposing her ear. She shut her eyes when she felt his sticky breath on it. "I asked you a fucking question." He growled.

"N-no..." She answered meekly. Her mantra from her childhood started up again. But instead of allowing her to escape, it rooted her to reality. She was grown now...why was she still afraid of him? She watched him go through her drawers- mockingly pulling out undergarments and teasing her with them. She felt her fear being replaced by anger as her mantra was replaced with Caroline's 'WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK?!' 

Yoosung gave up trying to call Eilis and dialed his trusty hacker friend instead. Though Seven had cut back significantly on his former profession after getting married, he knew he'd be willing to help if the need arose. And the need was definitely there. Mercifully, he picked up after the second ring. 

"How's my little baby boy?" He said in a singsong voice on the other end. 

"Sev- Saeyoung! I need your help!" He started huffing- having never run this much in his life. "I need you to hack into security cameras for an apartment." The request was met with silence, then a door closing, and the creaking of a computer chair. 

"I assume this is reeeally important?" Saeyoung asked, needing to assert that this was not some whim of Yooosung's. 

"It is! I need to see if anyone went into Eilis' apartment. I've only been there once, but..." Yoosung went through all of the details he could remember about the place, thankful to hear fast clocking on the other end. 

"There's a camera in her hallway, but it's not angled correctly. What time were you thinking of?" He asked. Yoosung wracked his brain trying to think of the last time he spoke to her. 

"I- I called her this morning when I woke up. So anytime between 10 a.m. and now." Silence again. More clicking. More wheezing from Yoosung. He was pretty sure he was getting close to her apartment building- a lot of landmarks were standing out to him. 

"Ah! Yep. I see a man...but like I said, the camera isn't angled well so I can't tell you much about him. It's either a man or a lady with really big feet." Yoosung thanked him and hung up the phone. He was hoping to get a little more information- maybe a height so he knew what he was walking into- but he just got confirmation that she was in trouble. It was better than nothing, at least.

Her stepdad was back from rifling through her things, and held kitchen knife to Eilis' pale throat. She winced as he pushed it in slightly. "I lost everything because of you...I'm going to enjoy this. I'm going to peel every inch of your skin off with this dull knife...." He continued muttering threats as he traced lazy curly ques down her body. He nicked her shoulder, and laughed when she grunted and a droplet of blood trickled down. She figured it was now or never, because he started to focus his attention on her ear, mumbling about the proper way to cut it so that she wouldn't lose TOO MUCH blood and die on him too soon. She brought back the only part of her that wasn't tied down- her head. She slammed it into his forehead as full force, causing her to see stars and him to stagger back dazedly. Her chair teetered with the forced of the impact and he cursed loudly, dropping the knife for a moment. Caroline rolled over and managed to get a hold of it. It was just for a second, though, as he placed his boot on the blonde's stomach and roughly pried it out of her grip. Eilis felt like she was watching the last bit of hope she had disappear before her eyes. 

But maybe not. All 3 people stopped to look at the direction of the front door as it busted open. Yoosung came barreling through, rubbing his shoulder. He didn't take even a second to assess the situation and launched himself onto the only person that wasn't restrained. He felt the rage boiling up in his stomach, and the adrenaline fueled him as he struggled with the larger man. He was noticeably surprised by the fervor in Yoosung's punches, and he gripped the knife before driving into the boy's stomach. Eilis screamed, but Yoosung stood up almost frighteningly calm. Blood dripped down and started to drench the carpet as he took the man's surprise to his advantage and stalked toward him. 

Still bloodied from the flurry of punches, Eilis' stepfather scooted across her floor and met the wall. Yoosung followed and gripped his leg to drag him away from it. He straddled the old man, and started to feel woozy as he reached his slender fingers around his neck. He gripped tighter, tighter, until nothing could be heard but frantic choking sounds. In the back of his mind, he heard Eilis screaming, too. Then a myriad of people shouting. Then there was nothing but blackness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yoosung slowly opened his eyes. Everything was stark white. He felt like he was floating on a cloud. He was so calm and happy. He blinked as structures started to come into focus. There was a light...and a television...and balloons....

"I can't tell if this is Heaven or Hell..." He muttered sleepily. A figure next to him leapt up and he was happy to see red stain the bleached world he woke up to. 

"Neither!" Eilis threw her arms around his neck and he smiled as he looked around. Yoosung was in a pretty nice hospital room, actually. It looked almost like a hotel room. He patted the woman gripping him comfortingly. She soaked his shoulder with her happy sobbing. "I was so afraid you wouldn't wake up..."

His mouth felt like it was filled with glue when he responded, "What...happened?"

"The police came. And you passed out, so an ambulance came. And then they almost lost you twice because your heart stopped, and then you were taken here and they were able to repair most of it and that Jumin Han guy came and put you in a better room, but that caused problems because when I came to visit, the new nurses didn't know who I was and there's more security here and and and and..." Yoosung laughed at her frantic explanation. 

"Are you okay?" He asked. She nodded fervently. "And your stepdad?"

"They arrested him." He's probably going to be gone for a long time. Mr. Han...or should I call him Jumin now? Anyways, he said that he'll use all of the legal recourse he has to make sure that he stays in there as long as possible." She beamed brightly. "I'm finally free!!" 

Yoosung brought her curly head close and kissed her full lips. He relished in the feel of them, knowing that the last time he was awake, he was afraid of never feeling them again. He made a mental note to go shopping for a ring when he left the hospital. But for now, he convinced her to situate herself next to him and held her as a parade of his friends came through the hospital room over the next few hours. Eilis sat by his side faithfully through it all. He watched her laugh with the RFA that had become so much like a second family to him, and dearly hoped that the next chapter of his life would be integrating her into it....and maybe starting a family of their own.

 


End file.
